Tuesday, November 06, 2007

Moving from blue to a paler shade of grey

It has been hard to shake the blues since we had to put down Rosie nearly three weeks ago. Brian thinks I shouldn't still be sad; Rick is slightly more tactful but also thinks I'm taking her loss awfully hard. I'll admit it; the magnitude of my devastation over losing "Rosie-Posie-Puddin'-and-Pie" was shocking even to me. If I go at Mach 9, I function just fine, but in quieter moments, the sadness is still there like a lead blanket, ready to envelop me.

I want another "doggie love" in my life, yet I'm afraid no other doggie love will do. Rick and I have talked several times about what dog(s) may be in our future. While we haven't reached a consensus yet, it may be that we get another bulldog for indoors (we both love them) AND an outside dog for Brian to romp with (that will be the tough one to agree upon). After we get back from a week-long trip, we will begin looking in earnest. Actually, I've already done some looking (it's a long story; maybe I'll get to share it some day). I would love to add one of these beauties to our family, but so far, Rick is very resistant to the idea:
While I wait for the next four-footed family member to join us, I AM getting in some spinning and knitting; Christmas is approaching, after all! Above is a glimpse of what's on the needles at the moment; I intend to cast on at least one more project while we are traveling. What DID I do with myself before taking up knitting?

Right now the second largest of my Japanese maples is at its glorious peak. Today's fog and the flowering cherry behind it provide a perfect backdrop. I'm sure it will look much different when we get back.

That's it for now from . . .

17 comments:

shepherdchik said...

Is the Border collie a potential for inside or for outside? I kind of want one of those too, but I'm just not sure I have to time to train it.

Lauren Dorsee Dillon said...

I still can get weepy over my all-time favorite dog, a Bassett Hound we had years ago if I stop and think about him. Give yourself time.

Border Collies are on the top of my next-dog (hopefully in a long while) list. I've begun to realize on a farm, even a pretend one, everyone needs to earn their keep. Plus, I hear they are so smart and easily trainable. Couldn't he be inside and out?

Michelle said...

While I don't want to tell "the story" yet for fear of being disappointed, here's a hint: that is NOT a litter of border collie pups!

~TigereyeSal~ said...

3 weeks is NOT too long to be grieving a dog who was your soulmate...

Those puppies have short, dense coats, square body-types and short tails- not border collies, but I can't quite figure it out. I hope you get the opportunity to tell the story, 'cause I'm very curious...

A new reader,

Sally

Texan Will Travel said...

I know what they are! :) Can I give everyone a hint, please, big sis? I have the perfect one in mind!

Michelle said...

No, little sister, no more hints yet. You know Rick may nix this idea; I almost didn't share anything about my desires because putting them "out there" might make the disappointment greater if he does. If he doesn't, the story I get to share will be complete and beautiful in its fulfillment.

Welcome, Sally, and thanks for stopping by! How did you find me?

~TigereyeSal~ said...

I found you through Lauren, 'cause you leave comments for her all the time. I don't know how I found her, maybe through Jenn (mommy needs coffee)? I spend too much time on here as it is; now I have to add your sister to my required reading list- my kids will never see anything except the back of my head ever again...

Nancy K. said...

I agree that three weeks is NOT too long to grieve the loss of a beloved pet! They are our best friends and provide unconditional love ~ that is not something that one gets over losing quickly!

I still feel sad when I see photos animals I have lost. Getting a new one does not replace the one that has passed on, it just gives us something else to focus on beside the hole in our heart...

I highly recommend the English Shepherd as the perfect home/farm/family dog. They are incredible.

shepherdchik said...

Michelle: oh, an Australian shepherd? We had one (who sadly passed away at age 18 last year) but he was grey speckled and had one blue eye and one brown eye so he looked very different. Gosh, he was just the best dog ever. He had already been trained by another shepherd to herd when I got him and we herded w/ him for a long time before his eyesight went. He was excellent with the kids too and we did let him in the house at night. At the time that he lost his sight, I had several southdown ewes (Pickle's ancestors)and they got really mean with him so I had to stop taking him down to the sheep and he really missed that. I have heard of some who had trouble with the breed but I sure loved mine. I am looking at maybe getting a border collie now, but like I said earlier, I don't have the time to train it so unless I come across one that is already trained, I probably won't get one.

shepherdchik said...

Yes michelle, I'm going to agree with Nancy and Lauren. You should greave as long as you need to. The fact that you are able to consider a new canine family member is a sign that your greaving is healthy. You will always miss them, only time will heal and the healing really just lessens the pain, it never totally goes away.

~~Sittin.n.Spinnin said...

Before I saw the picture of what I also thought was a border collie, I was going to suggest an Australian Shepherd, but maybe you're already there :) I have one full blooded Aussie and one half breed, and I have to say, if something ever happened to either of them I will be getting another. I took some pictures of them the other day, keep forgetting to down load them! Soon, very soon :)

Sharon said...

Our dogs picked us. I wonder when the time comes if a dog will pick you. BTW, Sittin'n spinnin' is a central Nevada breeder who is developing a flock of Tunis sheep.

Jamie said...

Grief can't be put on a schedule, you will always miss your fiend. You know that time will help you come to terms when you're ready. There's always enough love for 'just one more'.

I hope things work out for the pup you want. I look forward to hearing the story.

Kathy said...

there is a saying that the best way to get over something is to go right through it. I don't think "going at Mach 9" will help you here as these things take their own, sweet, long time to deal with - emotionally. If you don't it will just keep cropping up whenever you try to slow down. And having lost your Best Friend Forever is no little matter to be glossed over anyway. JMHO

Take the time YOU need, Michelle - but I know you will find another Buddy. Not a replacement - just another Friend to share life with.

Hugs....

Juliann said...

Hi Michelle,

Grieve as long as you need to, there is no timetable. I still find myself giving myself permission to spend an hour or so looking at photos of my Curly Joe and remembering all the happy times we had, as well as reliving his peaceful passing.
A new dog will fall on your lap, so to speak, and you will feel in your heart that it is right.
Peace be with you.

Windyridge said...

Three weeks isn't too long at all for missing a part of your family. You might find that the introduction of a new dog will help the recovery process a lot.

Kathy said...

How ARE you doing? I've been going to call, but figure you're still on the road...