Saturday, May 31, 2008

X is for ex

Right now my heart is heavy for a close friend whose husband wants a divorce. She does not, but I learned that one party can initiate and get a divorce even if the other party never signs a single paper. That seems very wrong to me. After all, it takes two people signing a marriage license to GET married; shouldn't it take two to sign the divorce papers before a marriage can be dissolved? Many will argue that it's no marriage if one partner don't want to be in it, but the verse "What therefore God has joined together, let not man put asunder" (Matt. 19:6) resounds in my head. Besides, God can do anything, even (especially!) restore broken relationships. After all, isn't that what Jesus came to earth to do? Provide the means to restore the relationship God wants to have with His children after Adam and Eve chose to believe the devil's lies instead of walk with God?

Anyway, it occurred to me in all this that I've never been an "ex" - except perhaps an ex-girlfriend to a few teenage boys that I dated but didn't commit myself to in any way, shape, or form. I'm not an ex-wife, or an ex-(insert your denomination or belief system). Sure, there are things I once was and am no longer, such as a child and a student, but those aren't states from which you can sever yourself (unless you drop out of school, I suppose). While my life as a child of divorce has not always felt stable, I'm beginning to realize that my life really has been stable, for which I am thankful.

In a GIANT leap in subject matter, below are the latest irises to open in our iris bed. I stroll by this long crescent every day, enjoying the fragrance and exquisite, intricate beauty of these regal flowers. Before we moved here, I didn't even know irises were scented!
That's it for now at . . .

5 comments:

knitmd said...

As a woman who has survived thus far, domestic violence and stalking, I am eternally grateful that no man can force me to stay married to him. I understand what you are saying about marriage and what it is supposed to represent, but there are some damn good reasons for divorce, and in those cases, signature or no, the divorces need to be granted.

Tina T-P said...

Boy you have been busy this week - I thought I was keeping up on your posts! Sorry to hear about Russell - can't wait to meet your sheep (or you either, for that matter) - I'm not an "ex" anything either - T.

Oh, and I'm really enjoying the pictures of the iris - what a nice bed that is - I can't remember - did you put it in or was it already there?

Michelle at Boulderneigh said...

Dianna, I agree, there are certainly circumstances that warrant divorce, with or without both parties' consent.

Tina, a wonderful neighbor of ours gave us all those bulbs when he thinned his bed AND helped me plant them! I've bought two or three more bulbs from Schreiner's, but they haven't done as well as the freebies; go figure.

Sharon said...

Biblically there *should* be no ex'es and I think that makes it all the more harsh for the one who finds themselves to be one. Your friend needs you.

Sharrie said...

As Sharon said, "Your friend needs you." Without friends that experience would be twice as difficult. The other life saver was counseling. Have been on the same side as she is, and please give her my best wishes.